Learning to “Sit in the Mess” to Lead Better with Sebastian Little

Sebastian Little says his life’s purpose is to create spaces for full self-expression and play. Understanding what makes individuals tick and how to use those motivations in service of their larger goals is a key component of his current work as a mental performance coach. This week, he shares his thoughts on the responsibility of leadership and the importance of giving yourself time and space to reflect on important moments in your life.

Over the years, Little has had to learn to synthesize his environment — to take in all the stimuli and information — and then consolidate the pieces that are actually important. From there, it’s possible to discard the things that are holding him back. It’s been a long road to learn how and why this process is important, and has taken moments of deeply personal reflection. But now, he shares his journey with others in the hopes of helping them find their own path forward.

Key Moments You Don’t Want to Miss:

  1. One of Many Why Sebastian Little says it’s a mistake to ignore the individual in a group, and how personal motivations can be key to self-awareness 
  2. Pieces of the Puzzle How having awareness, a good plan, and a way to execute it can pave the way to achieving your goals
  3. Family Matters How Little’s complex relationship with his father has shown him the importance of letting go and moving on
  4. Looking Inward How current events have given him the opportunity for introspection and time to reflect on questions of identity and place

What You’ll Learn:

  • Embrace your role on a team
  • Consolidate the things that are important to you
  • Let go of the internal friction holding you back
  • Work in service of your larger purpose
  • Sit with challenges and learn from them


“You don’t always have to accept the role that you have on a team, but choosing to embrace it is an important distinction we want to make. Being able to embrace your role is a choice, and that’s a choice to be a really good teammate.” -Sebastian Little

“The way we do small things is the way we do all things.” -Sebastian Little

“The beauty of humanity is when we can absorb and sit in our own mess. We can learn so much about ourselves and we can reflect on things that we never would have before. But when we fight ourselves when we’re in our own mess, we don’t get that same benefit.” -Sebastian Little


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Episode 254